Friday, February 26, 2010

The Best High Ever

Saw endocrinologist this week. He listened carefully to my progress and decided to bump my T3 supplement again. Just a little. Cause I was doing ok on the newest dose, but still not great.


Is this really what people feel like every day? With all the awake and happy and generally not wanting to lie down and die? SERIOUSLY?! THIS is what I've been missing for almost 20 years?!?!?!

Holy fuck.

Maybe it's just the placebo effect. But I'm thinkin' I finally found a doctor who knows what the hell he's doing.

And now... I'm gonna brave a possible windy day SPD Bear meltdown and take my little man outside to build a snowman.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Break's Over

After a weekend of choosing salad over fast food, a great hour in the pool and generally feeling good about the direction I've been going... I got on the scale this morning and found my weight up 4 pounds since Friday.

That's up 13 pounds in 12 weeks.

I swear to gawd I'm not sitting around eating all day. But with results like that, I might as well be. Stupid thyroid. Stupid metabolic shifts in late 30s. Stupid pants that don't fit.

I see the endocrinologist next week. But just like with the whole 150 I gained in the first place, I know this 13 isn't going to fall off even if we do get my meds back on track.


It was a nice break from the drudgery of The Calorie Nazi. One I needed, to sort out my new life with the therapy schedule of a special needs child and a parent suddenly living in Stroke Any Minute Land. But he's back now.


Saturday, February 20, 2010

Shiny New Cardio Option

We had a little bit of breathing room with the tax money, so last night Wonderful Husband treated me to a shiny new piece of cardio equipment...

2009 K2 Athena

I wanted something to to let me "run" with Bear once he starts going on bike rides this spring without the risk of more running injuries. I'm so prone to getting hurt these days I'm trying to come up with every possible way to have fun and still sneak in a low impact workout. I'm especially excited about blading with the jogging stroller. I know it's not a replacement for real run workouts, but I think it's a good way to sneak in some extra cardio when I'm supposed to be doing stuff for my Bear.

I haven't been on rollerblades in at least 15 years, but I was pleased to discover I hadn't lost all my (limited!) skills. I still need loads of practice before I can safely take Kona out with them, but I surprised myself with how well I did testing them at the store.

And they're called Athena! It's like it was meant to be.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010


During this morning's shower Bear brought a stepstool into the bathroom, climbed onto the sink, got into the cabinet, opened a childproof cap and took some of my thyroid meds. So, today was our first (and hopefully ONLY) call to Poison Control. Thankfully my thyroid meds were almost empty, aren't very dangerous and he only took 2. No ill effects.

Apparently nothing short of Fort Knox is "out of reach" enough for Bear. We've got the really scary prescriptions stored somewhere else up high but we're rethinking that. He's started using bigger chairs and climbing shelves to reach really high places - yesterday he presented me with the finger paints I keep stored in a bin above MY head.

Just now Bear saw me drop a bottle of ice cold water all over my feet and the kitchen floor. Then he repeated what I said. Which means Bear has officially dropped his first F-bomb.

Not the most prestigious day, but milestones nonetheless. : D

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

At Least It's on the Trainer

Apparently my little mechanic noticed I've been neglecting maintenance on my racing bike - just caught him applying chapstick as chain lube.

And in a rare convergence of winter germ-freeness, we're both healthy today. So as a reward for sitting through my tax appointment at the accountant's this morning I'm taking him to the gym for a swim. I dare anyone to say mixing Bear with water doesn't count as a workout!

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Moving Right Along

Managed to work out twice last week. TWICE! In ONE WEEK!

That's, like, CRAZY.

The second time I actually did the thing people always say they'll do but mostly never actually do - I had 27 minutes to spare and my options were squeeze in some work or some blog reading or some housework or a workout. I chose the 27 minute workout! Go me!

I've got the 'registration is open' notice for that June tri in my in-box.

At least gonna wait until payday to pull the trigger. But after finding time to work out twice in a pretty darn hectic week I'm feeling good about my decision to be a little selfish and give myself some tri time this year.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Another One for Saint Bombeck

I should have known Bear was going to make the day interesting. When I wouldn't pop cheerfully out of bed at ridiculous o'clock, he passed the time between notifying me he was awake and me actually getting up by crawling into my bed and emptying an entire container of dental floss.

I found myself hoping it was a full container, because that would buy me a few extra seconds in bed.

I wanted to sneak in a quick shower before his OT arrived. As I was getting into the shower I saw him trot by carring a $40 tube of skin cream. With the cap off. I yelled to him that it wasn't food and moved on.

He popped his head in once to register his displeasure, but other than a random scream (that I've come to learn means "how dare the dog eat my cracker after I spent the last 5 minutes waving it in his face") the shower was uneventful. Quiet, even.

So. I open the shower curtain. To find Bear clinging to the edge of my bathroom sink with his feet on a stepstool. A stepstool that's hanging off the edge of another stepstool at a ridiculous angle. The whole mess is on a rug, which is slowly sliding away from the sink. He's got his daddy's toothbrush in his mouth.

I grabbed a towel and calmly asked if he needed help. He nodded solemnly, daddy's toothbrush bobbing up and down. I rescued him, noting the open bottle of Aveeno lotion he'd apparently been using as toothpaste. He grinned and moved onto the next item on his agenda.

Which, as far as I could tell, involved drinking the contents of the dog bowl one toothbrushful at a time.

While I was getting dressed he took a break from his 'toothbrush as beverage delivery device' experiment to see if he could get the dog to drink from the toothbrush. I suppose it makes sense - the water was from her bowl. She didn't see it that way.

As I headed downstairs to do my thrice-weekly panicked pre-therapist arrival cleanup he was sitting inside my bathroom cabinet, methodically removing the contents and lining them up on the floor.

After he ran out of lotions to arrange, he came downstairs, brought his stepstool over to the bananas strategically stored out of his reach and stole one. He was so proud of himself he forgot he wasn't supposed to be stealing bananas, brought it over triumphantly and dropped the peel onto my keyboard.

Sunday, February 07, 2010

Where Things Are At

Seems the universe is determined to derail any semblance of motivation, resolve or progress I'm trying to make.

Bear's been on abx again for his 4th ear infection since November.

Mom's in the hospital again with 4th mini stroke in a month. They found a blockage in her basal artery and a 75% blockage in her vertebral artery. In hospital since Wednesday. On coumadin IV, might get to go home by today (or tomorrow or next day).

Scheduled time to hit gym last Thursday, but getting only 3 hours of sleep from the situation with Mom made me spend entire day with migraine instead.

Scheduled time to hit gym Friday, but MIL was sick and would only take Bear long enough for me to get groceries.

Planned to hit gym today, but Wonderful Husband came down sick and won't be taking Bear to that Superbowl Party and I won't get the time to myself after all.

My shoulder is acting up, probably from all the big active heavy Bear lifting wrestley spinny stuff that's part of daily Bear therapy. Learned enough from last experience I'm pretty sure I've got bursitis from impingement again. Almost hoping they can just give me another cortisone shot to deal with it, don't have time or money for anything else, and the idea they'll just tell me to rest it is comical.

Not pregnant after 6 months of trying. My midwife is impressed I've managed to maintain a 50 lb weight loss even with gaining 10 back with the recent meds disaster. She suggested if I can lose maybe 15-20 more it will probably kick my body back into gear so I can have another baby.

Increased dose of the new thyroid meds has helped, but I'm still living with levels of exhaustion that I refuse to believe are typical for a normal person. Follow-up bloodwork soon will probably say my levels are within normal limits because that's how it always seems to go. Trying to figure out how to function when I'm so tired all I want to do is sleep and cry.

Mom's telling me not to come visit, but when I was down 3 weeks ago she asked me to help put her will together. Need to get it done asap - if she has a bigger stroke and loses any cognitive function we'd be up a creek. We want to make sure my (half) brother and SIL - who are shouldering 99.9% of the burden of The Insanity of Mom - get fair treatment in the will because on paper they're not technically related (especially now that Mom's divorced from my half-brother's dad) and if things went into probate they would get nothing. NOT cool. Plus, I'm her financial POA and have no idea where anything is and need to get stuff figured out just in case. I don't think I'm overreacting - Mom's even been telling me her burial wishes just to be safe. So I'm packing up later this week for another trip downstate to crazy town.

In spite of all this... I'm still determined to race this summer. Between Bear therapy and the new developments with my Mom it's not reasonable for me to continue with plans for my Oly. I simply can't devote the time. But I firmly believe I can get back enough fitness to do my favorite sprint in June. Some of my girls have also said they'd like to come along for the ride.

So. New paradigm. More stress. Less sanity. Still devoted to following a path of health and fitness. The road's just a little rockier now.