Cautiously Optimistic

This is the beginning of a new era. Maybe. While the actual thing deserves a drumroll, ta-da kind of moment, I've learned the hard way not to get too excited about it yet. Here's the scoop...

After 10 years of being on Propanolol (generic of Inderal) for migraine prophylaxis, and after more than a year of veeeeery slooooowly tapering the dose, as of Friday I'm off of it completely.

This is a really big deal to me because I hate that I have to take so many medications; coming off this one means I'm down to only my thyroid prescription. I still take pills in the morning (multivitamin, occasional antacid, sometimes acidophilus) but I feel like it's different if they're voluntary.

But like I said, I'm still being cautious. Inderal is first and foremost a blood pressure medication; migraine prophylaxis is an off-label use. But because it is a blood pressure medication, changing the dose or missing a dose are a big deal, and going off of it is a big production even if you don't have the risk that daily, debilitating migraines will come roaring back into your life.

During the years that the headaches kept getting worse, the dose kept getting higher. At its highest it was up to a mammoth 160mg - the first time I tried to fill it the pharmacist actually said "hmmm, I don't know if them make that size". After a few years of that dosage controlling it I made several attempts to taper, but the headaches always came back immediately. But this time was different.

Once I started losing weight and feeling healthier overall I went to my doctor to try again. Due to the past failures he didn't want to try again, but I convinced him because I desperately want to be off it. With some of the stepdowns I had a noticeable uptick in migraine frequency, but I was patient and it always evened back out after about 3 months. And then I'd go down one more notch. I was supposed to be off it a couple months ago, but decided not to mix the stress of the holidays with attempting to go off the meds.

So, last week was the last step down, and it was only for 5 days (as opposed to the 3+ months I've been doing at previous steps).

The first day on the lowest dose (last Monday) I had dizzy spells and was headachy by the afternoon. Same with the 2nd day. And the 3rd was the worst - had bad dizzy spells during my workout (probably stupid to keep going, but wanted to push through it and run another mile) and another headache by afternoon. At that point I was convinced my quest to quit would be delayed yet again.

I clung to one other potential explanation: the headaches were possibly just good ol' Aunt Flo (that bitch) announcing her impending arrival. That theory does seem to be the case, so I adopted the another theory that the dizzy spells were my body experiencing exercise without a massive dose of blood pressure medication in my system. I have to consider the fact that even though blood pressure was never my problem, I have been taking a medication that affects it for a decade now. So that's another reason to temper my celebration until I'm sure it will be ok.

It's day 3 off the meds completely, and so far so good. No migraines, no regular headaches, no dizziness.

Here's the crazy part: I'm noticeably sleeping better. Because turns out, a known side effect of this drug is sleeplessness. About 10 years ago I went from sleeping like a log to near insomnia. I only put the two things together a few months ago, and there was still no real way to be sure; since I was already attempting to come off the drug I figured it was a bit late to ask for an alternative. Well, now that I'm already sleeping better (and by 'better' I mean I'm only waking up 2-3 times instead of 4-6, I'm having actual big crazy REM dreams again - you know, the kind where you're like 'ok, so I'm making out with Bo Bice in a dorm room and then we get attacked by giant leeches shaped like manta rays' - the kind of dreams that mean you're in a nice deep sleep, and I feel more rested when I wake up.) I guess I can say that was the problem. I remember being a morning person in high school... wouldn't it be great if this whole tired-all-the-time, morning-bitch-monster-from-hell thing was just a phase?

Tuesday will be my first drug-free run workout; if I make it through that with no dizziness or headache then I might get out the noisemakers.