Perspective

Still coughing up a lung. Still frustrated as all getout I can't exercise.

Sometimes when the full extent of my health problems hits me it's easy to throw a pity party. Especially since I didn't start out with them, so I remember what it was like to be normal and healthy. I went from completely fine (well not completely, I had oligomenorrhea) to: chronic migraine, hypothyroidism, GERD, IBS, infertility, chemical sensitivities, environmental allergies, high cholesterol, borderline diabetic. Did a temporary bout of hypoadrenal too. Plus injuries, like my weak ankle that sprains if I just look at rough ground. And I probably forgot some stuff.

But I try to keep this old saying in mind: God doesn't give with both hands.

When I think about that I remember how lucky I really am. I mean, when you've got more blessings than you can count something's gotta give, right? For me it was health. I'm not bad looking, even for being ridiculously overweight. And you know how they say brains or beauty, pick one? I didn't have to. My IQ has tested in the 150 range; not only am I eligible to join Mensa, from what I've read I'm technically eligible to join this other group (The 1% Society) - they make fun of Mensa, say they party too much. I've even got a huge rack - and not in a fat chick kind of way. Even as a size 6 I was pushing a D cup. Some girls hate being well-endowed, I think it's fucking fanstastic (except when shopping for jog bras, then it sucks) because they're incredibly useful tools.

Correction - they're not always tools, often I regard them as ridiculous appendages that need their own budget to support them. I'm not hung up on breasts the way most people are; maybe it's that I'm a biologist, but I regard them as natural and normal and why on earth can't they be on tv? I'm not above using mine - I once got into a bar at 19 by handing the guy my (real) license, looking him in the eye and undoing my top button. Just found a hilarious shirt I'm treating myself too - it says I'll Be Using These To My Advantage. Gotta love it.

Huh - how did I get on a tangent about breasts, anyway?

So yeah, my point is that even though I'm sick, and I'm sick to death of being sick, I've got it pretty good. In addition to the attributes I was lucky enough to be born with, I'm living in my dream house doing my dream job with a dream of a guy. So I really can't complain.

But three weeks is a long time to be this sick and even I am reaching the end of my patience... this goes on much longer I'm gonna end up taking Elle's suggestion and start self-medicating with whisky.